Crafting Unforgettable Funny Wedding Vows

  • Publication date: 06/06/2024
  • Updated: 06/06/2024

Weddings are a time of joy and celebration, and what better way to amplify the joy than by sharing a laugh with your guests? Funny wedding vows can be a refreshing twist to your ceremony, lightening the mood and making your special day memorable for everyone involved. Not only do they show off your personality and the unique bond you share with your partner, but they also keep everyone engaged and entertained. Here’s how to sprinkle your ceremony with humor with some fantastic vow ideas!

What's the Point of Funny Vows?

Photo by @erinandtara

When you think of a wedding, tradition often comes to mind: solemn promises made in earnest. But love isn't just about solemnity; it's also filled with laughter, quirky moments, and fun. Funny marriage vows add a personal touch and reflect the joyful, lighthearted aspects of your relationship. They help break the ice and set a warm, inclusive tone for your celebration. By choosing to incorporate humor, you're showing that your marriage will be one full of smiles and chuckles, perfect for couples who don’t take themselves too seriously.

Funny Wedding Vows for Him

Photo by @katie_harmsworth

For the grooms out there who want to infuse their vows with a little humor, it’s not just about making a promise; it’s about making your partner laugh and ensuring the audience is entertained. Crafting funny wedding vows to make her cry can be a delightful way to showcase your personality and your deep understanding of your relationship’s lighter side. 

  1. I vow to always steal the covers, just to have an excuse to pull you closer. Even in the summer, when it's way too hot, I'll still sneak some covers and blame it on the dog.
  2. I promise to laugh at all your jokes, no matter how many times I've heard them. Even if I've heard that one joke a hundred times, I'll still chuckle because it's your signature joke.
  3. I vow to always be your personal spider killer, without keeping score. Even if it's 3 AM and I'm fast asleep, I'll get up with a shoe in hand, ready for battle.
  4. I promise to listen to your advice, and occasionally take it. I might not always agree, but I'll always appreciate your wisdom and occasionally, I'll even admit you were right.
  5. I vow to lead our charge when the zombie apocalypse comes, as long as we both shall live. I'll even let you pick the getaway car and the soundtrack for our survival adventure.
  6. I promise to always put my dirty socks in the laundry basket... eventually. It might take a few reminders, but they'll get there, and I'll always thank you for your patience.
  7. I vow to let you have control of the TV remote, as long as it’s not during the game. But I promise to record anything you miss, and we can watch it together, no spoilers.
  8. I promise to always protect you from bugs unless it's a butterfly. For those, I'll just scream and run away with you.
  9. I vow to love you even when you’re hangry. I'll keep an emergency snack in my pocket at all times, just in case.
  10. I promise to pretend to be sad when you beat me at our favorite video games. I might let you win occasionally, but let's keep that between us.
  11. I vow to make you coffee every morning, even if I've just figured out how to use the coffee maker. And if I mess up, I'll be your personal barista run and get your favorite from the cafe.
  12. I promise to keep my phone down and listen to you, whenever you need me. No distractions, just us, because your words are more important than any screen.
  13. I vow to share my fries with you, even if you said you weren't hungry. And when you inevitably steal the crispy ones, I'll just pretend I didn't want them anyway.
  14. I promise to always find a new reason every day to fall in love with you again. Whether it's the way you laugh or how you dance in the kitchen, there's always something new to adore.
  15. I vow to remember the end of this vow as much as I remember our wedding date. And if I ever forget, I promise to make it up to you with breakfast in bed and your favorite flowers.

Humorous vows are a fantastic way to express your commitment and love in a light-hearted manner. They not only provide a moment of levity during a deeply emotional ceremony but also help in showcasing the fun dynamics of your relationship. 

Funny Vows for Her

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For the brides who want to bring humor into their wedding vows, it’s an opportunity to showcase the playful side of your love and ensure that your promises are not just heartfelt but also light-hearted. 

  1. I vow to always let you have the last blueberry pancake. On lazy Sunday mornings, when the aroma of pancakes fills the air, I promise to fight the temptation and let you claim the last one. It’s a small token of my love, knowing how much joy that last syrup-soaked bite brings you. And should there ever be a shortage of blueberries, I vow to pick them out of my pancake and sneak them onto yours.
  2. I promise to agree with you when you say, "I'm right," because let's face it, you usually are. Whether it's about directions to a new restaurant or which Netflix series to binge-watch next, I’ll nod and add my "Indeed, you are right," because teaming up with you means sometimes admitting your winning streak in decision making. This vow comes with the promise to always celebrate your wisdom and occasionally, remind you lovingly when I turn out to be right.
  3. I vow to laugh at your puns, even when nobody else does. Your sense of humor is one of the many reasons I fell in love with you, and I pledge to always appreciate your punny side. In gatherings or quiet evenings together, your jokes will have a guaranteed audience in me. I’ll be the echo of your laughter, ensuring you always have a partner in humor.
  4. I promise to keep my cold feet warm on your side of the bed. As the nights grow cold and the bed becomes our cozy sanctuary, I will sneak my chilly toes under the warmth of your legs. Not only will this keep me warm, but it’s also a perfect excuse to stay close to you all night long. This vow is my playful way of saying I need you close, in warmth, and in love.
  5. I vow to only watch the next episode of our favorite show together. No matter how tempting it is to see what happens next, I’ll wait for you so we can share every surprise, laugh, and cliffhanger together. This vow ensures that our favorite characters’ journeys are something we share, making our TV time our special bonding time. Even when the plot twists are too much, you’ll find me right by your side, remote in hand, ready for our next viewing adventure.
  6. I promise to support you in all your fantasy football leagues, even if I still don’t understand the draft picks. I may not know my quarterbacks from my tight ends, but I know how much joy your fantasy league brings you. I vow to cheer with you on your victories and console you on your defeats. And maybe, just maybe, I’ll sneak in a question or two to finally understand what a 'PPR league' really means.
  7. I vow to love you more than I love my cat, but you should know it’s very close. As much as Mr. Whiskers holds a special place in my heart, you surpass him with your charm and your endless affection. This vow is my humorous way of assuring you that in the hierarchy of my heart, you are always at the top—even if it's by a whisker.
  8. I promise to always pretend to be surprised by your surprise gifts. No matter how much I might guess what you’ve got planned or hidden away, I’ll act shocked and delighted every single time. This promise is about cherishing your efforts and loving the thought you put into making me happy.
  9. I vow to listen to your long stories, even if they have no point. I love hearing your voice and the way you tell stories with such enthusiasm, whether they lead somewhere or nowhere at all. It’s one of the charming quirks that drew me to you, and I promise to always give you my full attention.
  10. I promise to maintain my sense of humor as we grow old and less gracefully. We'll laugh at our own jokes, find humor in the quirks of daily life, and keep our spirits young at heart through every wrinkle and grey hair. Laughter will be our timeless link through the years.
  11. I vow to let you have a better umbrella when it rains. Even if it means I get a little wetter, knowing you’re dry and comfortable will always bring me joy. It’s just another way I want to take care of you, come rain or shine.
  12. I promise to always laugh with you, and sometimes at you. In all the years to come, my laughter will be with you in triumph and misadventure alike. It's a pledge to enjoy every moment we share, no matter how silly or serious.
  13. I vow to handle the bugs if you handle the cooking. While I may not be the chef in our family, I can certainly be the exterminator. This division of labor is my commitment to teamwork and playing to our strengths.
  14. I promise to keep updating my vows as we go because one set can't possibly cover a lifetime. As we grow and evolve, so too will my promises to you. I look forward to creating new vows that reflect each stage of our life together.
  15. I vow to always keep my love for you as fresh as our wedding cake. Even long after our wedding day has passed, I’ll continue to find new ways to show my love and keep our relationship sweet and exciting.

As you recite these vows, let them be a testament to the joy and the unique bond you share, making your wedding day truly unforgettable. Remember, the best marriages are those where you can laugh together, and these vows are your first step on that joyful path.

Funny Wedding Vows Inspired by Literature

Photo by @hellojessnicholls

Incorporating humor into wedding vows with a literary twist can be a delightful way to personalize your ceremony and reflect your shared love of books. Here are five humorous wedding vows from literature that are perfect for light-hearted, yet meaningful, wedding vows:

  1. “I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it.” - Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love
  2. “To be fond of dancing was a certain step towards falling in love.” - Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice
  3. “I married him for his money and am prepared to stick to him until he gets some.” - Rose Franken
  4. “We are all fools in love.” - Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice
  5. “If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as funny as you really are.” - H.N. Turteltaub, The Sacred Land

These quotes blend the romance of literature with the fun of your personal connection, ensuring your vows are both meaningful and entertaining.

Fun Wedding Vows from Movies and TV Shows

Photo by @paytonuruetaphotography

Adding fun and recognizable quotes from movies and TV shows into your wedding vows can make the moment even more memorable and enjoyable for everyone. Here are some famous quotes that can be playfully adapted into wedding vows:

  1. "You complete me." - Jerry Maguire. This iconic line delivered by Tom Cruise can be humorously tailored for a lighter moment in your vows. You might say, "Just like Jerry Maguire, you had me at ‘hello’, and yes, you complete me—and my Netflix watch list."
  2. "I love you 3000." - Avengers: Endgame. A sweet and trendy line that's become a favorite in recent years. Using this quote could add a modern and heartfelt touch, especially if you're both Marvel fans.
  3. "As you wish." - The Princess Bride. This line, repeatedly uttered by Westley, is synonymous with saying "I love you." It’s perfect for vows, symbolizing your promise to always put each other's wishes and happiness first.
  4. "I’m your density. I mean, your destiny." - Back to the Future. A humorous misquote from George McFly that could be used to add a lighthearted moment to your vows, indicating that you are meant to be together, even if you occasionally fumble the words.
  5. "To me, you are perfect." - Love Actually. This quote from Mark's silent declaration using cue cards can be a romantic and loving part of your vows, affirming your unconditional love for each other.
  6. "When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible." - When Harry Met Sally. A profound and beautiful line that perfectly encapsulates the eagerness and joy of beginning your life together. Ideal for a sincere yet touching moment in your vows.
  7. "I declare a thumb war." - From various TV shows and films. A playful line that could be used to lighten the mood, suggesting that even the small battles in life can be fun when they're with the right person.

These quotes from movies and TV shows offer a range of options, from deeply romantic to cheerfully humorous, allowing you to tailor your vows to reflect both your personalities and shared interests.

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Natali Grace Levine Editor-in-Chief

Manages The Wezoree's content strategy
Writes and edits articles for the Inspiration Blog